Thursday, June 20, 2013

Curvy Kate Tease Me Bra

So, in my quest for new bras that fit, I decided to give Curvy Kate a second try.  Their basic bra had been close the first time I tried one, and they do offer a couple of sexier/more colorful styles.  In my quest to try a variety, I also had to try out another store, since Bravissimo's selection of Curvy Kate bras was kind of lacking.  This go round I ordered from figleaves, another UK site.  Figleaves has both a US and a UK site (which is kinda nice), and they have a shipping center stateside for returns, so you don't have to pay international shipping for returns.  Also worth noting is the fact that you can order from either site--I strongly recommend ordering from the UK site, especially if you're ordering multiple items--the price difference will more than cover your shipping and foreign transaction fees (A bra that runs $70 on the US site will run around $45 on the UK site, once you convert currencies).
Both figleaves and Bravissimo seem to be pretty good about returns--my Bravissimo return went well, and while I did exchange one of the bras I ordered from figleaves, their returns system is pretty standard as well.


Curvy Kate Tease Me Bra


I tried this one on in a 30H and a 28HH in purple and red respectively.  I thought it was pretty cute, and wasn't disappointed.  While it is a padded bra, the padding isn't insanely thick and it seemed fairly well constructed.  This style apparently runs a bit large in the band--I found the 28HH fit significantly better.

But.... (There's always a but, isn't there?)

One of the complaints I'd seen from other bloggers about this one was that it gave a "cakes on a platter" sort of look.  Most of the photos I'd seen looked fine, and I had chalked that up to the general taste for excessive lift that many large breasted girls seem to have (usually the phrase you hear is, "I don't want my boobs under my chin."  Personally, I'd rather have them under my chin than at my waist, but that's another story).  And then I tried it on--I have worn corsets that didn't serve my breasts up like that.  Cakes on a platter is an accurate description, with minimal hyperbole.  While supported, the girls did not feel at all secure, and I'm fairly sure excessive motion on my part would have launched them into space.  I also found the straps to be uncomfortably far apart (and keep in mind, I prefer wide set straps).  Instead of coming up off my boob, the straps came up across my armpits, which was neither comfortable or secure.


PROS:
--wide size selection (once you pass GG the pickings tend to get slim)
--colorful and sexy
--supportive

CONS:
--expensive (not so bad at 30 GBP, but insane at 70 USD)
--insecure
--overly wide set straps
--bands run large

Monday, June 3, 2013

Jockey's "Revolutionary" New Sizing--Hope or Hoax?

Some of you may have heard about Jockey in the news recently.  If you haven't, here's a decent article detailing their "revolutionary" new approach to bras.  For those of you too lazy to click on the link, I will elaborate.

Jockey looked at how women's bras are sized and said, "This makes no sense.  We can do better."  So, they put up some cash, and did some research and came up with...drumroll please...volumetric sizing.  The way this works is you order one of their fit kits, which comes with 10 plastic boob forms, a measuring tape, instructions, and a lingerie bag.  You then measure for your band as normal (under the breasts, tightly) and find which boob form fits you best.  Whatever the number of that boob form is, that's your cup size.  So, you wind up with sizes like 5-32 and 9-40 and whatnot.  You then have your choice of five--count 'em, five--different bras in the sparkling color palette of white, nude, and black.

Now, at this point, I'd like to refer you over to fellow blogger Charla Welch, who kindly ponied up the $20 and ordered the fit kit.  She has an excellent review of the actual kit, so I'm going to save my time (and money), and look at the sizing system itself.

First off, I'm rather reluctant to trust my boobs to a company known for making men's underwear.  I mean, I think they've made some sports bras, but let's face it, they don't call them jockey shorts because jockeys wear them.  I'm pretty confident that Jockey has my hubby's back, but I have my doubts when it comes to the girls.  That aside, I would like to applaud them for attempting to try something different.  Bra sizing is completely insane, and anyone willing to tackle that challenge earns my respect.  That said, this is a gimmick.

Yeah, you heard me.  A gimmick.

The first--and most obvious--problem here is that Jockey offers absolutely no conversion scale to traditional sizing.  While I understand that the idea is to breakaway from traditional sizing, there is no way that five styles of bra are going to fit all women.  No way.  So, if you order the kit (which does come with a $20 coupon and supposedly is refundable), and find your new size, but none of their bras fit right, you're kind of screwed.  I mean, you know that you're now a 6-30, but what's that translate to in normal sizes?  Sure, you'd love to stick with Jockey, but if the bras don't fit right, they don't fit.  Also, if you're a specialty size normally (i.e. very small or very large), how do you know any of those plastic cups are going to fit you at all?  I mean, seriously, I'm currently trying on H and HH cups (and they're fitting).  I'm pretty sure those cups aren't going to be big enough.

Secondly, Jockey's whole idea with "volumetric sizing" is that women's breasts are shaped differently (which is true), so how can we accurately gauge their size with one horizontal measurement?  This is absolutely correct.  There are about eleventy billion differences in breast shape, size, fullness, width, and all those other factors that make bras nearly impossible to find.  That said, I encourage you to look at this image of several of the fit cups that is on Jockey's website.

Really look.

There is no difference in the shape here.  It's the exact same shape, only scaled up or down.

What the hell, Jockey?

And don't even get me started on the price.  You have to pay to find out what your size in their brand is?  I don't care if you give me credit towards my purchase, that's insulting.  And, frankly, if I'm going to pay $60 for a bra, I want a sexy pretty bra, not an ugly sports bra (admittedly, most of my bras are in the $60 range, but some people have more options).

My next argument is really more of a suspicion.  What if the reason they don't have a conversion chart is because they're using the same cup sizes and just calling them something different?

I'll admit, part of my suspicion here comes from that fellow blogger I pointed you towards.  She noticed that the cup number was the same as the difference between her bust and band measurements.  While this could very well be coincidence, that would be a very convenient (and more logical way of sizing.  However, that would also mean that there's no real difference in how the bras are sized.  You can call a tomato a pear, but it's still a tomato.  And, let's be honest here, they haven't done anything innovative with the band here--the only difference is they're not adding inches like half the fitters/manufacturers do.  If they really have just changed what they're calling the cup sizes, it's not much more than vanity sizing--now if a woman doesn't want to believe she's a DD, she doesn't have to.  She could be a five instead.

I also question exactly how they're managing the grading for these things.  You see, one of the many difficulties in manufacturing bras is the sheer number of different products.  This is a great article that explains the difficulties inherent in bra making, and there's a great section on grading about a third of the way down.  In a nutshell, bra grading is how manufacturers minimize the number of different parts they have to use to make the widest selection of bras.  If you've heard talk of sister sizes (like how the cup is the same size in a 34A, 36B, and 38C), this is exactly what makes that work.  The caveat is that your band size affects your cup size. Have they really managed to just plug the cups into different bands?  I mean, theoretically that could work, but there are so many factors to take into consideration.

Finally, I'd like to point out that they haven't changed anything about band sizing.  Admittedly, the band sizing is less broken than cup sizing, but there are still a few problems--like the fact that bands only come in even sizes.  Or the fact that bands only go down to a 30 (I think if 26 and 28 were widely available, we'd all be amazed at how many women would fit into those bras).

I think Jockey's really bold for trying something new with bra sizing, and, if nothing else, they are carrying the widest selection of sizes of any American manufacturer.  But this isn't enough.  The bra is an insanely complicated garment (seriously, read that article about bra making, it will open your eyes), and there's no way we can boil that many curves down to just a couple of numbers.  Having looked at what it takes to make the damn things, once you take into consideration the sheer number of variables that make up a pair of breasts, as long as we stick with off the shelf bras, we are going to have fitting problems.  Ultimately, I think our solution is going to lie with materials--what we really need is something like Marty's jacket in Back To The Future II, where you push a button, and it automatically adjusts to fit you properly.

This is what the future of lingerie looks like.

Maybe the real solution is to take bras out of the realm of fashion and recruit some engineers.  I bet they'd be more supportive, at least.

Either way, thanks for trying, Jockey, but I think I'm going to stick with traditional sizing until we find something that actually fixes the problem.

Bra Reviews! Bravissimo Satine

The last bra from this batch was Bravissimo's Satine, also in a 30H (UK).

Ooo, shiny.

I initially really liked this one--it's pretty and satiny, and available in four colors--black, white, red, and navy.  I ordered the red one (of course), and, of the this batch it definitely fit the best.  The little button in the middle was also a really cute touch.  Best of all, it's lightly padded for nipple coverage.

Unfortunately, just as I was all set to clip the tags and say, I'm keeping this one, I noticed something really weird.  Like, more weird than the flattened quadraboob torpedo thing the other ones did.   I'm almost not entirely sure how to describe it, but I'm going to try.  I was looking in the mirror and noticed an odd fold towards the bottom on my boob.  I did the necessary gymnastics to get a better look at what was going on down there.  Somehow, my breast was filling out the entire cup, but there was like this fat fold in the cup that doesn't exist in my boobs.  And the cup was full, so it wasn't just a fold in the cloth--the bra literally created a fat fold where one doesn't exist, either on me or in the bra on its own.  I feel confident saying that it was, without a doubt, the strangest fitting problem I have EVER experienced with a bra.  It also made me really sad, because I thought I'd found something that would work.  

Pros:
--affordable
--available in multiple colors
--lightly padded
--flattering cut
--relatively true to size

Cons:
--possibly not designed for human breasts




Bra Reviews! Bravissimo Betsy Bow

Our next review will be a little on the short side, since our next bra fit pretty much the same as the  Alana.  The Betsy Bow bra is another one in an adorable print (which, seriously, how often do we get those in this size range?), and I also ordered it in a 30H (UK).

 
Awwww!

I had that same disappointed feel I had with the last two regarding the fabric--much cheaper than I expected.  Bravissimo clearly has some excellent photographers, because the products look sooo much better in the pictures than in real life.  It had that same annoyingly bizarre fit, so at least the brand is consistent.  I did like the purple accent bows, but, like the last two, it was also unlined (perhaps Bravissimo should work on their descriptions a little bit?).  Overall, disappointing.

Pros:
--affordable
--wide and cheerful color selection (lime green and bright pink, among other colors)

Cons:
--bizarre cup shape
--band runs a little big (a 28 would probably give me sufficient support, but I don't like it enough to try)
--sleazy fabric
minimizes (might be a pro for some)
unlined (might be a pro for some)