Monday, September 7, 2020

Back on The Bra-dyssey! Catching up, New Parameters, and Sewing Hell

 If you followed this blog years, ago, you may have thought it was dead and are surprised to see a new post.  I know I am, I had pretty well given up.  Bras are hard, and I settled for the best fit I could afford.

But we're back because I need new bras, they're fucking expensive, and I now have an added challenge due to a unique dress code at my current job.  Weight's been put on, weight's come off, and ladies, I am well and truly screwed in the over the shoulder boulder holder department.

My current job has a metal free dress code, which means that none of my clothing can have any metal on it.  None.  Not a bit.  And I'm sure some of you are thinking, oh, man, no underwires at your size?  Sux 2 B U.  But no, it's not just no metal underwires, it's no metal at all, which means not only no metal underwires, but no metal findings on the straps, and crucially, no metal hooks and eyes in the back.  Surely, you ask, that's not enough to set off the metal detector?  It totally is.  I set it off all the time before this dress code went into effect, and they cranked up the sensitivity since then.  At the time, I had put on some weight, and was able to find exactly one bra that met this excruciating parameter and actually fit at Lynx Sportswear, and I do recommend it if you're a busty gal looking for a sports bra (maybe I'll do a review at some point if I get to it).  However, I have lost some weight since finding that little gem, that if I order the same size the band will be too big.  Unfortunately, I have either pissed off a god somewhere or earned their favor in an extremely uncomfortable way, because I lost zero pounds off the girls, meaning that if I drop down a size, there will not be enough room in the cup. 

This was literally the only bra I found that was metal free that even remotely fit me.  Currently, I've done some creative alterations to make my old and depressingly worn out ones fit a little better so they aren't hurting my shoulders, but clearly, I'm going to have to take matters into my own hands.

For years now, I have wanted to make my own bras, if only cause they're so damned expensive at my size.  But trying to draft a pattern has been a bloody nightmare due to the geometry of the cup.  My current measurements are 35in rib cage with a 48.5in bust (don't be thinking that's an hourglass, my underbust is just the narrowest point of my torso).  That is a lot of boob to try and contain.  

And so I finally bit the bullet and ordered materials and a pattern.

Now, if you're going to be making bras, the absolute best place hands down to get your patterns and bits at is Bra-makers Supply.  Bra-makers Supply was founded by the woman who actually drafted many of the bra patterns you'll find on the market today, Beverly Johnson.  She's taught classes for years and still does, (including online ones), and has even written a vast two volume manual on the topic.  Woman knows her shit, and I salute her for her work, because holy fuck, making bras is enough to drive you absolutely batshit insane and she's made her business and life's work out of it.  Thank you, fairy Bra Mother!!!

I sent an email to them (her business has expanded enough to need a bit of a crew) and inquired as to if they had any patterns that would likely fit.  I hadn't done the math to figure the cup size, so I asked if they had anything that would fit a 38HH, as that's about what my most recent bras were, give or take.  The patterns do not use UK cup sizing, and have in fact recently changed to a unique system designed by Johnson herself, which I at least like the principle of, so I had no idea how that would translate to boobs.  They recommended the Ingrid pattern as it has the widest size range and is designed to not need an underwire, so I went ahead and ordered that as well as a fabric and findings kit.  

Now, I'd like to take a moment to talk about the innovative sizing system Johnson has come up.  I fucking love it, because it makes a hell of a lot more sense.  Instead of taking all the measurements and doing all the math, her patterns currently use the Bottom Cup Depth measurement to determine size.  As described on the site, if you put on your best fitting bra, this measurement is from the lowest point of the underwire to the apex of your breast.  It does have the down side of requiring a bra to be worn, but honestly, I did it both with and without one and still got the same measurement, so your mileage may vary.  I really like this though, as it's a direct measurement and more relevant.  It may need a bit more refining, but it's still better than the current "subtract and the difference is your cup size" system, which really falls apart after about D.

I measured and got 5.5 inches for my bottom cup depth, which really surprised me because I expected bigger.  But remeasuring didn't change it so that's what I went with.  One of the really nice things about making your own bra is that if your rib cage is between sizes you can custom fit it, and I gotta say, making a 35 inch band just made my day.

This was without a doubt the easiest part of this entire fiasco.


So I got my pieces cut out, which would make my mother cringe, but you can't fit a bra until it's been made.  Like, a dress or shorts, sure, you can do a paper mock up, but where a bra uses elastic and whatnot, it won't have the same give.  So you just gotta sew and pray.

And really, really, pray.

I'm going to be brutally honest with you guys here.  I kinda suck at sewing.  I'm not very experienced and I have needed a seam ripper on almost everything I've made, at least the first time.  I currently have a simple knit dress I'm working on that I drafted a pattern for from an existing garment, but I fucked that up, too.  But hey, I can figure things out, right?  I'm smart, I can do this.

Ladies and other bra needing people, do not attempt this if you are not an experienced seamstress/tailor/garment sewing person. You specifically need garment experience, quilting is not going to cut it.

My garment making experience going into this consisted of a skirt.

It was wholly insufficient.

There was so much swearing, seam ripping and not a little crying.  At one point I took a break and made a pair of shorts to boost my confidence, and also sewed together that dress I mentioned earlier, which is how I know I fucked up the draft (the neckline is too big/low, I'mma add trim, it'll be fine).
I have never made a garment more complicated than a skirt (that did have a zipper tho), and I made fucking pants and a dress to build my confidence back up from this fucking sideshow horror.

I completely understand bra burning now, and I am down for one. 

I also understand why bespoke bras are so dang expensive, the people who make those probably aren't charging enough.

So over the course of several weeks, I assembled this bra.  There are a number of things I don't much care for about the pattern and directions.  I won't lie, if it wasn't for the fact that I knew this pattern had a cup size large enough fit me, I would never have bought it.  This is not at all the style I like, and, if you clicked that link up there, you'll notice the cup construction has a triangular top piece.  This is a very British cup design and one that invariably doesn't work for my breasts, as it puts a downward slope on the top and mine are, well, round and full all over.  I also absolutely loathe having all that coverage across my cleavage, it's begging for extra boob sweat, even if it is made of power mesh.  But I figure, we'll get it put together, see how it fits, and then kinda figure from there if the other patterns might work.  The most important thing with this bra was figuring out how the heck to build one.  Which I did.  Emphasis on figure out, because there were a few times the instructions were not as clear as the could have been. The top band elastic and attaching the adjustable half of the straps was especially confusing, and I have may crumpled up the directions and thrown them downstairs trying to attach the latter.  I don't care for how the pattern directions finish the seams and what not--there's a lot of press and topstitch, which I would rather die than do, and there are zero directions for how to work out a lining.  I think for future bras, I will either just figure out a lining, or, more likely, do what the ready to wear ones I have do, and put a bit of fabric tape over the inside seams to clean it up.  The seam allowances are also hella tiny on bras at only 1/4".  TBH, I'm not even sure where that is on my machine, as best I could measure it seemed to be the edge of my presser foot.  I would've also liked to have seen more details about which stitch to use for everything.  Basically, most of my complaints would've been non issues for someone who knew what the heck they were doing.  I mean, we have a pattern here graded to make up to 200 different sizes, if that's all that's lacking we are totally winning.

The biggest problem I had, and this was the part that made me scream and throw things, was that the findings kit and pattern included and called for a 3x3 hook and eye closure, but the back band was sized for at least a 4x3 closure.  This made attaching the strap elastic incredibly challenging, as I had to attach it low enough to be able to encase the back band in the closure pieces and basically ignore the acutal edge of the fabric, which was curved.  This was compounded by the fact that there was zero info about how long to cut said strap elastic--the only length mentioned for that component was .5m, and that was in the materials list, which covers all the sizes.  The elastic included in the kit was actually longer than .5m, so I just cut two 25cm lengths and called it day.  However, doing this left me with not a whole lot of room to attach it.  Measure once, cut twice, eh?

In purple, the hardest and most opaque portion of construction.

Once I got it finished and finished crying after banging my knee on my sewing table (trick knee, the trick is that bumping it hurts so much you can't stand on it for a couple minutes), I put it the accursed bra on to check for fit.  The first thing I noticed was the band, which was absolutely amazing and fit perfectly.  Never have I had a band fit so well, mostly because they're all too big or too small because I have consistently been between sizes.  The next thing I noticed was the straps.  Normally I do not at all care for a padded strap, but these were actually comfy.  Might keep that on a later one. 

Seriously, tho, some folks may like this style, but I would literally never buy a bra like this unless it was the ONLY one that fit.  Not at all my cup of tea.


Modeled by Eliza, my dress dummy, who is padded out a bit to be closer to my dimensions, although I really need to update her.

Please for the love of all that is holy, do not look at any of those seams, they are atrocious.  I don't know wtf is going on with my zigzag stitch, if it's a feed issue on my part or the machine's or what.  It's a new machine, but it was refurbished, maybe that's what it got sent back for?

 

But then I looked in the mirror.  The 5.5 BCD cups, which I measured for at least three different times, were waaay too small. Now, maybe I fucked up and didn't get the seam allowance small enough, but honestly, even if I did, they were still a good 3 cups sizes too small.  I mean, my nips are at the apex of my boobs (not trying to brag, but the girls are pretty perfectly proportioned, unlike the rest of me), so there were not a lot of ways to mess it up.  I think it would be helpful to somehow add a breast width or something to the sizing method, though lord only  knows how you'd do it.  Maybe go from the side, like from the ribcage on the side of the breast to the apex?  Checking that gives me like an 8ish BCD which sounds much more accurate.  Damn, I ordered a new pattern, too (that does not go up that high).  Guess I'll be learning about grading on the next one.  Good thing I ordered the manual. 

I am going to cry. So. Much.

All else aside, tho, this was a really good learning experience, and while I would've done better to get the manual with the first order or even take one of Johnson's craftsy classes, I think it still worked out decently, even if it totally doesn't fit and the seams are all hideous messes.  Many important lessons were learned here, such as seam ripping on elastic is a horrible idea.  I'm going to take a break for the next one (get that dress done, maybe make another pair of cozy shorts), but I've got the manual and the Shelly pattern coming in this week.  Grading that up will suck, but that one is much closer to the style that usually fits me, and I think it'll be less painful.